How it began...

Here's a recommendation for a blue morning: go to Yahoo News and find the photo of the day. More than likely it's something fascinating from some corner of the world that will either make you smile, think, or shake your head in wonder. This morning the page features a horned frog on top of a mini pumpkin at the Bronx Zoo, two of nature's marvelous offerings paired not for humorous effect but for "behavioral enrichment," says the zoo. Keepers look for ways to stimulate the animals "both mentally and physically." You could say this photo did the same for me.

http://news.yahoo.com/photos

And if we add up the impact of the next photo - John McCain caught in an unfortunate grimace behind Barack Obama; and the next, an impenetrable thicket of sailboats in the Barcelona regatta; and after that, a man with a chandelier-like mosaic of fruit stuck to his ceiling in preparation for a feast in Israel – well, it's probably worth getting out of bed each morning, just to have another facet of our amazing world revealed to us. This is life's greatest gift to humanity: to be able to sense and reflect on Earth's overwhelming bounty. Every day our personal world enlarges to encompass what we've seen, heard, tasted and felt. Granted, that may be more than one person's senses can handle, thanks or no thanks to technology. But if we set our filters for delight and surprise, the 'inbox' brings messages that can ease a tough day.

It is inevitable that you will experience at least one small thing today that interests you or makes you smile. These are your gifts for the day. Hang onto them for dear life, for during the toughest times they may be all we have.

Here's mine lately:

Birds I've never seen on the backyard feeder (cedar waxwings!)
Yorkshire Gold tea with cream and sugar
My neighbor's garden
Singing to a favorite song
The farmer's market
Stretching
Walking
Doodling
Sharing deep thoughts with a friend
Seeing the sun come out repeatedly on a cloudy day
Warm wind on my skin
Good eye contact with a stranger

I could list many more. And even though I struggle with depression (lifelong dysthymia), I consider the ability to list more a true blessing. The glass is always more than half full in my book. I'm one of the most optimistic people I know. What's the depression from, then? Damned if I know: exquisitely sensitive temperament and nervous system; difficult upbringing; blood sugar and other hormonal issues; astrological sign (Virgo with Libra Moon and Sagittarius rising); karma; all or none of the above. If I ever feel helpless or hopeless about anything, it's the ability to get out of this box, to punch or love or accept down the barriers that have kept me from doing much besides coping with wildly fluctuating emotions and moods. I'm a smart person. I've read the books and seen the therapists and practiced the visualizations and sat the meditation. I'm thoughtful and introspective to a fault. And until recently, I managed the moods well enough to have a job and a quiet social life and a reasonably "normal" existence.

All that changed in my late 40s.